I have thrown some tantrums and shed more than my fair share of tears in my day…but last Saturday, I lost it, y’all. My very own mini-meltdown.
My boyfriend and I have had the “where is this going” conversation ad nauseam over the last two years with all of the “crisis—ing” I’ve been doing. To his credit, I have always been satisfied with the outcome of the conversation. Every. Single. Time.
Given that fact, one would think I would shut up about it.
It’s the skeptic in me. I need to see the results to accept them. Taking someone’s word just isn’t good enough. Well, skepticism led to talking, talking led to questions, questions led to frustration… which of course led to tears, and that aforementioned meltdown.
My mother used to call it “beating a dead horse”. Clearly I haven’t outgrown this form of equestrian abuse.
If he and I have agreed that we have similar life goals, but neither of us is nearing that finish line yet, then why press the issue? “Beating that dead horse” isn’t going to make either of us any more ready – it’s also not going to get me to any conclusion any faster.
There’s a strong connection here. The stall I have experienced as of late in my professional life can be attributed to this need to see the end result before having put in sufficient work. Focusing on what I still haven’t achieved – instead of focusing on good, hard, honest work to get there – isn’t going to get me that CEO nameplate any faster either.
I think he’ll be proud of me for this moment of growth. That is, if he doesn’t kill me for writing about him first!